Middle School Principal
Raising a Mature Child
Helping your child mature is a worthwhile goal. And by cooperating with your child's natural maturing process, you can achieve great results with minimal effort.
Set clear expectations.
Even toddlers can make simple decisions and complete easy tasks. Keep the number of decisions appropriate to the child's age. For example, offer a toddler the choice between two outfits, not the task of picking an outfit from an entire closet of clothes. Carefully train your child to handle a simple chore, and help him or her with the task until your child is ready to do the chore successfully unassisted.
Allow the natural consequences.
Too often, parents protect their children from the natural consequences of their irresponsible actions. At other times, parents impose overly harsh penalties. Neither response achieves the desired results. Where possible, allow the child to experience the natural consequences of his or her actions. For example, does your son repeatedly forget to bring his completed assignment to school? Resist the urge to take the homework to the teacher for him. Rather, allow your son to suffer a lower grade. The sting of the natural consequence may teach a greater lesson than any rescue or nagging from his parents. Help him develop a strategy for remembering to take his work to school. Help him set up a box for his papers, and encourage him to put his work in his book bag as soon as he completes his assignments.
Praise responsible behavior.
While natural consequences provide the stick, praise is the carrot. Praise your child's attempt at taking responsibility. By specifically lauding the positive effort, you reinforce your child's good behavior and encourage maturity.
Are you intentionally helping your child become more responsible? By setting clear expectations, allowing your child to face the natural consequences of his or her irresponsible choices, and praising your child's successful efforts, you can encourage responsibility in your child with minimal effort.
This article was taken from the March edition of Cut & Paste Magazine.
